Yo Gabba Gabba Cupcakes!!!

Here they are... the long awaited cupcakes!!!!

Well, this week at school was the letter "Y". I've been trying to make a snack for each weeks letter of the week! So tonight I just finished trying to make Yo Gabba Gabba yellow cake cupcakes for Dominic's class. I think they turned out pretty darn good!! I feel very Martha Stewartish!! Next week is letter "Z". I'm stumped. Pics of my cuppiecakes to be posted tomorrow! Dominic was not feeling 100% today. Had lunch at Applebee's with his Nana and all of a sudden he stiffened up and I could tell he was in pain. He tried so hard not to cry (as usual) but burst into a full on screaming, crying session. It lasted about 45 seconds then happened again. Twice about 5 to 7 minutes apart. We had to leave in the middle of lunch. Poor little guy! I just wish so bad he could tell me what was wrong!!! Came home and he was really fussy all night long. Crying again right before he finally fell asleep. At 10:45 PM!!! I hope he feels OK for school tomorrow! I have the beginning of a VERY busy two days in the morning!! And with my parents out of town in Laguna for vacation, I don't have anyone to help me out!! Sleep well my little angel boy!! Wake up in the morning feeling like you always do!! I hate it so much when you don't feel well and I can't figure out what is wrong!! Mommy loves you, Dominic Joseph Scott!! :)

Saturday

I love days like today!! Haven't even changed out of my pajamas yet!! Being lazy and hanging out with my favorite person in the world is such a treat!! I pray for more days like today and less days like most we have together!! :)

My Littlest Hero. You teach me more in one minute than I have learned in thirty nine years! You are the bravest, most determined, and most inspiring soul I have ever known! Thank you for challenging me to learn, adapt, and grow! I hope one day to be able to become even half the human being you have been since you came out of my body and made your debut in this world. I love you to the moon and back!! Your oh so proud mama!! XOXOX

My life is about as far away from the dream I've had for the past thirty nine years as you can get. I always saw myself with a great and loving husband, 2.5 gorgeous, perfect children, great job that I loved doing, nice car, my own house... you get the picture. I never could have dreamed the life my reality is today. I am the single mother of an amazing angel who is living everyday with Cerebral Palsy. I am fortunate enough to have the most amazing family ever who is allowing me and my son to stay in their home and drive their car. I have never been married, do not have a paying job, (but if you ask me, I do work full time for no financial compensation), have no significant other, never finished college... but enough of my sob story. My life is all about my precious angel and everything that comes along with being a mom to a child with special needs. It's the hardest thing I have ever had to do. I feel overwhelmed on a daily basis. It's certainly not easy to be mommy and daddy to a child, but I think it's probably even more difficult when your child is 100% dependant on you for all activities of daily living! One person has a tough time doing everything! At least this one person does! It's something I never thought I would have to do. Alone. But every morning when the sun rises, I thank God for this crazy, insane, sad, joyful, proud, struggling, roller coaster of a life I have been blessed with. All I have to do is turn my head to my right and see the perfectly imperfect soul that God has entrusted me with while here on earth and it makes all the tears, all the heartache and heartbreak, all the sweat, the fighting, the unwanted education worth every minute of it. I have been pushed further, hit harder, and soared higher than I ever dreamed was possible. I think that my grief is sadder, my celebrations are sweeter, and my pride is greater than a lot of other people I know. Having a son with a disability like Dominic's has awakened parts of me I never knew existed. It's a very in-your-face existance I live. It never goes away or gets better or easier for me or my son. I guess that was the plan all along. I have no doubt that Dominic was the greatest blessing I have ever been given. He was given to me for a purpose, a reason. He has changed everything about the person I was and the person I am today. It's really been an eye-opening, heart opening experience over the past 4, almost 4 1/2 years now. This is my life. He is my life. No more dreaming of what might be or could be... only of what is. It's really strange for me to think about my life before Dominic and I can't and won't imagine my life after him. I have begun to learn to be content in the moment. I have learned that dreams are OK to have... as long as you know that for us, they might never come to fruition. I now have to work on becoming okay with that. Okay with the fact that life is never what you think it's going to be. You have to find happiness, fulfillment, grace, gratitude, faith, and love in every minute of every good hour of every day. And in the other ones... you just need to keep looking!

My greatest blessing

I never felt more blessed than on the day I became your mommy! You are my everything now and I am can not say enough how proud you make me everyday and the amount of joy, satisfaction and completion you have given me! I love you more than all the stars in the sky, Dominic Joseph!!

Being a mom is hard. But being a mom of a child with special needs is harder. God chose me for a reason. I hope I live up to all his expectations. I feel so blessed to have Dominic in my life and adore him more than all the stars in the sky! The range of other emotions I feel on a daily basis is something I have a hard time describing! I am so thankful I found this place to let out some of this craziness I now call my life! I do love you son! Always.